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Choose Healing Over...

Choosing to heal is living, but not living as we have been taught. Healing is living in peace with ourselves, it is letting go of our past, it is internalizing that it does not change and that each present moment lived becomes that past that we will continue to remember. Healing is realizing that you are the navigator of your life and that you can choose what kind of memories you can build from this very moment.

It is so simple and at the same time so complex. If only we could all understand that when we make peace with our past, find ourselves in our present, life becomes lighter, more livable, and more beautiful.

Forgiving, accepting, letting go, and not fighting with our past allow us to value what we have in the present. Each detail is special and helps us understand how valuable life is, and how blessed we are. When we recognize ourselves for who we are in our humanity. It allows us to identify those around us in their humanity too. Forgiving ourselves is forgiving those who have 'harmed' us accepting ourselves is accepting others, and releasing expectations imposed on us is releasing those expectations on others.

Even when we are in the darkest, most traumatic moment, we realize that we are ALIVE I said this from the button of my heart and as simple or strong as it might sound we can decide how we want to get out of that experience, only we have that power, only we can heal ourselves, only we can decide to take a step in our favour, we can always make that phone call, go to therapy, ask for help to a loved one, be vulnerable, we can always be honest and real to ourselves and know what the first step should be, only we know that.

We are alive, we have ourselves, and that is enough to continue, that is enough to decide to LIVE, that is enough to choose us and to choose to heal over the circumstances we face.

Very few people know that last year, in the middle of a severe depression, I consider taking my own life. I was immersed in pain, in the trauma I experienced 22 years ago, an experience that regardless of all my suffering was simply not going to change. Regardless of my PTSD, my continuous panic attacks, my emotional beatings and yelling, I knew the situation was simply going to remain the same, would continue to be present as it had been since I was 6 years old and would continue to do so for the rest of my life, I learned however that it did not mean that I have to make my life miserable, that I had to relive the same trauma over and over again.

My present does not have to be that moment of decades ago, does not have to be trapped in that narrative so destructive, so unlivable, so full of suffering, so empty, perpetuating the pain to the point of getting physically, mentally and emotionally il.

Depression thought me that I was choosing to live in my trauma, depression made me stop and OBSERVE, before depression I was running and running, not processing the experiences that I've lived, without my depression I would just get going without asking myself if that was the life that I wanted for myself. Depression was my soul begging me to stop.

Healing is choosing the path of love over fear healing is placing yourself in the PRESENT MOMENT, knowing who you are, what you have and under what conditions you live. And guess what, if you don't like your present, you can decide differently from what you've been doing.

What people say about how we are masters of our lives is real, the day you understand that, your life will be different, your perception will change and you will become the navigator of your reality.

Healing is understanding that absolutely no one but YOU can live your life.

Healing is taking responsibility for your life, making peace with your trauma and understanding that you are not your pain, that you are much more than your trauma and that you deserve to live a beautiful life.

Healing is returning to your present and living it, situating yourself in your current life, in your age, your geographical space, your home, your relationships with your family, friends, partner, soul, physical, mental and emotional health, money, work, hobbies and most importantly YOURSELF.

If you understand that you alone are responsible for yourself, what if you build a reality that is cool to live for you? Not in the eyes of anyone else but yourself. Now! As soon as you emerge from the trauma, forgive, accept, let go of your past, make peace with it, and return to your present. It doesn't need to be perfect or amazing it just has to be real, reflect your choices, your priorities, your self-love.

Once you identify aspects of your current reality that you don't like, you can start making small changes and experimenting a little. Start facing one fear at a time, and as you face each fear, you begin living the life you know you deserve.

Healing is creating our present, and trusting ourselves and our process. Whatever comes our way, we are capable to handle it. How we react to life situations is what will make a difference in how liveable our life becomes, if we react from fear with stress, irritability, frustration, anger, etc. or if we react from love with acceptance, goodness, gratefulness, etc. the impact in your life will be different even though the situation remains the same.

A healing process involves forgiving yourself, accepting yourself, loving yourself, changing yourself, evolving, building yourself, betting on yourself. It involves enjoying every moment to the fullest, and allowing all emotions to express themselves, come out, and continue their journey through this temporary existence.

Healing is about listening to ourselves, opening a conversation with our inner voice and asking it what it wants, what will make us happy, or at least less miserable, our inner voice has all the answers that we are looking for as individuals. My inner voice can’t answer your questions as your inner voice can’t answer mine. We can receive support for sure and I hope you open up your heart enough to let that support comes, if we feel that we can’t figure the answer out asking for help and getting tools will always be choosing ourselves over the trauma.

What your heart really wants to fulfil your soul's purpose and finding this purpose takes time and is something that you build as you go. Observe your life as a whole not just one area.

Healing is treating yourself with love and compassion, is being kind and knowledge that you couldn’t have known better before because you didn’t have the tools you have now, healing looking at the past versions of yourself and giving them a big hug for bringing you here to this moment where you are taking care of yourself and choosing differently for your life.

Please heal, life is so beautiful once you decide to start healing ♥ it becomes livable.

With much love and from the depths of my heart, I wish you to heal. We all deserve to heal and I hope that you choose yourself and heal one wound, one fear at a time, and experience how light life can becomes when you heal. Please choose healing over … ♡


Interactive Activity

When I was a child I learned to keep quiet, I learned that keeping silent prevented problems, that my silence avoided bothering people around me. I learned to be modest and keep things to myself, to collect pain and become 'strong' with those silences.

Until the day I couldn't take it anymore, until my soul exploded with secrets, and silence was no longer an option.

For a long time I have been asked what my paintings mean, and today I can say that my works are my SILENCES, they are how I learned to express myself non-verbally. Each colour and each shape is a reflection of what is happening internally each joy, each love, each frustration, each anxiety, each anger, each sadness, and each ecstasy, that is why my work is so expressive because they portray my emotions.

In my paintings, I recall both my ''better days'' and my ''worst days'', moments of monotony, but also moments of movement and emotion. I recall breezes, waves, seas, autumn afternoons, mountains, fantasy and earthly paradises, unexplored galaxies, majestic trees and incredible landscapes, holes, vortices, spheres, and cycles.

I believe that my art can be both everything and nothing at the same time, and the observer decides how to interpret it. Each person who looks at my work sees a reflection of themselves of what they want to see in it and remember. My work invites the viewer to create their reality from what they see, my work invites the imagination to uncover what lies within.

Now is the time for you to paint your SILENCE.

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